Stuck in the mud was a fun concept as a kid. Do you remember this
primary school playground
favourite? For those of you who need a
reminder - the concept of stuck in the mud (as we played it) was that
you had one person who was "It" and the rest of the participants aimed
to escape being caught. Once caught however, the player was stuck in the
mud and was unable to move. Stuck. No movement. No going forward. No
falling backwards. Stuck. They needed to stay put - legs slightly apart
(second position distance for the childhood ballerinas among you) and
you stayed there - stuck in the mud - until another player rescued you
by tagging you and crawling through the gap between your feet. This game
gave us hours of fun through my young childhood and it may have been
the same for you.
Fast forward to adult hood and the concept of
being stuck isn't so much fun. It certainly doesn't feel like a game...
And unfortunately, especially for mid career professionals and even
sometimes for those quite early in their career but a few years into a
job - this feeling of being stuck (and too still for comfort) is quite
common.
So what do you do? Are you content to stay stuck or do you crave movement of some kind?
For those of you ready to move, here are 3 tips for becoming "unstuck":
1. Do something different
Often
feeling stuck can relate to monotony. Your routine may look like any of
these. You go to work, you go home. You go to work, you go to a fitness
class, you go home. You wake up the kids, make breakfast, rush out the
door and do the school run, go into work, come home and make dinner, go
to bed. These are all different scenarios and whether you are following
one which looks like this or one which doesn't - if you can describe the vast majority of your day to day and week to week process as a 'routine', you may need to do something different
in order to get getting unstuck. Go to a (different) dance class, start
training for a charity run, meet up with your university buddies,
babysit for a friend, have lunch with a mentor, do something touristy in
your city... It really doesn't matter exactly what you do but you just
need to commit to doing something different to avoid monotony.
2. Take a break
Related
to the first tip -taking a break is one of the best ways to do work
towards becoming unstuck. This doesn't have to be a 2 week vacation on a
beach (though that would be great if you could swing it!) but it can be
a one night spa break with some friends or even just a one-day out of
town trip. Get out of town, take in some different air, and enjoy the
break in routine. Sit on a pier and watch the world go by. Have a picnic
in a park. Whatever you do... Do also make sure this is a break from
technology too where you're fully enjoying your own company or the
company of the people you're with. No emails. No facebook and twitter.
Just you and the break you deserve. With the break will come some
clarity and with clarity - informed, more intuitive decision making can
follow.
3. Enlist support
First, a disclaimer: Enlisting
support is not a free pass to moan and complain to whoever will listen (i.e. Just bi***ing to
your friends does it count)... But a well thought out, constructive
support system is often a crucial step in becoming unstuck. Why? Well...
Have you ever had an experience where a someone has shared a challenge
and you felt confident to share useful insight? I bet you have... And
you may even have received a response like "I never thought of that."
Adversely, ever noticed though that if you had a similar challenge you
were less likely to have the same useful insight about yourself? It's
true (and common).
With that in mind, if you need to get
unstuck, get support. Do not keep banging your head against a brick
wall. Meet up with supportive girlfriends, talk to a parent or sibling,
tap into the experience of a mentor (I did that years ago when I asked
an ex-boss of mine to review my CV as I truly felt like I couldn't
improve it further / didn't know where to go with it - and he was
instrumental in helping me get unstuck) hire a coach to stretch and
challenge you - and more.
I hope these three tips connect with
you... And even if they feel scary - that's quite a good sign as to
get unstuck and move forward you need to stretch out of your comfort
zone.
To sum up, a notion that one of my mentors, Lisa Sasevich, shared is great encouragement to do something to get unstuck. She quoted:
"
A step in the wrong direction is better
than staying on the spot all of our life. Once you're moving forward
you can correct your course as you go. Your automatic guidance system
cannot guide you when you are standing still... action is the secret
sauce."
So - remembering that imperfect action is better than no action at all, I wish you luck in getting unstuck. Try some of the above... you'll be amazed how far you'll go!
*****
Want to use this article on your blog or ezine? No problem... you just need to include the below:
Gina Visram is a career coach, speaker, mentor and author who works with
ambitious, multi-tasking women (and men!) who are ready to work hard at
being successful in their careers and personal lives - on their own
terms. She has recently published Happily Ever After for Grown Ups: A Post-Wedding, Blues-Busting Guide for Newlyweds" and is committed to helping people get over overwhelm and achieve the career success/life balance they seek. For more information and to sign up to her free newsletter visit www.limitlesscoaching.com.
